You think you know me.......

2007-03-07T10:36:00.000+08:00

have you ever felt that your life is really not up to par? like it could be alot better, but its not?

months back, someone did something to me and fathehah, something pretty serious, which ended up in me and fathehah cutting this someone off... this someone was a great friend of mine, one i held closer than any other... i hated what she did and i made sure she knew that i did...

but yesterday...

i was waiting for fathehah to finish her test, happened so that this someone was doing her test as well and in pretty much big trouble... i dont know why, but i helped her out... for a minute there, it felt like our fight never happened... why is this so? do i still have my bestie instincts? do i still have a shred of concern for her? i felt so much more whole, than ever before, going home that day...

what should i do? should i just end this silent cold war? or do i stand my ground in defense to past crimes?....

60% of myself says end the cold treatment... start from scratch... but the other 40% is pretty convincing... lets just keep things status quo and see how it goes....

catcha later, gotta go beat up the nerd....

KAI JYE WHERE ARE YOU?

2006-12-06T04:03:00.000+08:00

hey everyone... havent been able to sleep properly past few days, been thinking about something... someone actually...

someone i havent seen in months, since the beginning of september...

well anyways, list of my top 10 favourite songs

1.Nemesis-Arch Enemy (reminds me of a certain loved one)
2.Bat Country-A7x
3.Ulitimate- Lindsay Lohan
4.helena - MCR
5.I wont see you tonight - A7X
6.welcome to the black parade- MCR
7.so far away - staind
8.when you were young - the killers
9.something
10.something

2006-11-08T22:51:00.000+08:00

today one of my class mate got into trouble, with some outsider

i helped her out, tried to talk to her, but when it was over, i asked her how it went and she said none of my business... wah knn i felt damn what man

like wanted to beat the fish out of this butch...

nvm... i'm leave it for now... comm dying, need to charge...

cheers

2006-11-08T00:13:00.001+08:00

I'M GETTING DAMN FED UP WITH MY MUM!

its about this comm, it hers

i only borrow it to practice my adobe stuff, do some research on things i like and blog la of course

but the thing is that i dont have creative freedom, meaning that when i want to do something, i cant because of some mundane restriction by her... the only time i can practice my school work, namely my illustrator and photoshop is from 10pm onwards... day time i'm usually out at sch and stuff...

i need to practice my work, because i forget very easily plus i cant really catch everything teachers teach in class, i kinda learn more alone... most parents would encourage children to do their work right?

but you see... my mum is a special person.. a kind of breed we call bit*hes...
i've hated her for over a decade and i havent forgiven her for anything.. because i dont want to forgive...

she doesnt deserve my forgiveness, she can kiss my ass!

i really need comm access which is why i got close to her to get this comm... but she's so damn anal about her own things...

for example.. back in my house in woodlands when my parents were still together...
she and my grandma destroyed our expensive black leather sofa by lying down on it(my mum is a fat assed bit*ch)... my dad paid for it and he was quite mad that it broke

years later in this house... when my mum got a sofa from her boyfriend(dont know what he sees in her), i slept on it because i was damn tired after work... wah she kao peh kau bu until email my dad la and all that shit wah f*cking hypocrite sia she, my dad being a gentleman just kept quiet...

she cares the world about her things, but dont give a shit about anyone elses

just now a dinner she complain that my grandma piss her off la, ruin her hari raya blah blah...

i thought to myself, wow, i had the same opinion about her lol, being a bit*h must run in her family...
luckily i have 99.9 per cent dad's genes and i'm proud of it...

sigh my dad made a bad decision and married another bit*h... younger and smarter and louder... poor papa...my dad may not have a diploma, and he may not be highly educated... but he would sacrifice himself for me... and thats why i love my dad very much god bless him...
i miss him so much... i feel so sad that i dont get to see him everyday...
silly me i'm crying like a baby
i really miss my dad and i hope i can meet him again soon...i cherish the times it was just him and me and i'll hold them in my heart forever... love you dad, yr son misses you...
all of you reading this and who have still both parents lving with you together.... cherish them...
you dont know how lucky you are to have a happy family...

if GOD could grant me a wish... i wish my father had never gotten remarried... and i would still be living with him... things would have been so much better

to be honest i never blamed my dad... for anything... even my current plight
you want to know why? its because he never treated me like a child... he treated me like an equal, a grown up since i was a baby... my dad is truly a saint... i hate myself for the times i caused him problems and times i hurt him... i hope he'll forgive me

the reason i picked up guitar, is because i wanted to be like my dad... he taught me all he knew... shared his prized guitar with me, which i still have...

Everynight, i thank GOD that he allowed me, Mohamed Syafiq Bin Johan, to be his son...
i'll never stop thanking GOD for this... Never...

To my lepak kaki, my drinking buddy, my teacher, and my best friend...
I LOVE YOU DAD... MISS YOU VERY MUCH...

2006-11-07T00:01:00.000+08:00

well... i got alot of issues with alot of people so i'm not going to wait any longer

1) to that frikking nerd bitch who told me to shut up after i asked her where she was during a briefing... wtf is your problem... i walked out of briefing to go look for you wen you were missing... kindness doesnt pay! and this is the same biatch that portrayed me as a girlfriend abuser on her blog and named my name... look biatch... you realise i didnt put your name here?
i can but i dont want to...TO SAVE THAT UGLY F*CK FACE YOU HAVE.

2) to that ex bext friend of mine who invited everyone to her place for HR celebrations
and told my girlfriend that she didnt want me to come for some unknown reason, "open house" my ass... open to all but me la
well... the reason you became my EX best friend is because you are so frikking inconsiderate
you made so much frikking noise when i was stressed and i told you niceley to keep quiet but NO... you made more noise and then i had to scream and shout at you for you to STFU
and since the day you stopped talking to me, i havent done sh*t to you ok, so the way you treat me... is ALL YOUR F*CKING FAULT... NOT MINE

3) to that stupid F*CKING asswipe throwing vcds from higher floor... F*CK YOU! DO IT AGAIN AND I'M GOING TO FIND YOU AND THROW YOU OUT THE WINDOW TO MEE T YOUR F*CKING VCDS

4) to that F*CKING MOTHER TOAD ASS WIPE IN MY CLASS WHO THINKS HE'S SUCH A STRONG BIG GUY WHEN HE'S A FRIKKING SKINNY NERD....
DON'T PUSH ME TOO FAR... I'VE BEEN TOLERATING YR NONSENSE FOR ALMOST 1 YEAR... THE OTHER DAY YOU NEARLY GOT THE SH*T BEAT OUT OF YOU OK LUCKILY FATHEHAH WAS THERE... ONE MORE TIME... NVM I WONT SAY WHEN IT HAPPENS YOU WILL KNOW

5) to the somebody with the psp and who asked hanisah for 60... SCREW YOU! i know you very rich can pluck money out of your ass... do you even have proof that she did anything to e stupid psp? she's not so tok kong like you can pay 500 plus for the stupid black thing with a screen...
get a life... bother my little girl again and i will kill you...

6)now the best one....(ahem ahem)

TO THAT FUCKER WHO CALLS ME BRO... AND HIS GF WHO CALLS ME BROTHER...

HAHAHA

SOME BROTHER AND SISTER YOU GUYS WERE... VERY NICE HOR...
WHEN I HAD A BIG BIG PROBLEM IN SEPTEMBER... WHERE THE F*CK WERE YOU TWO? I SUFFERED LIKE NOTHING EVER BEFORE AND YOU TWO ABANDONED ME
TO MY DEAR "SIS" HI HOW ARE YOU? HOW DOES IT FEEL LIKE TO BE A LIAR?

QUOTE FROM YR MSG....

"AND I WILL MAKE SURE YOU FEEL THE LOVE, CARE AND EVERYTHING A SISTER SHOULD DO TO A BRO... ANYTHING I WILL GUIDE YOU THROUGH THE WAY"

WOW...(CLAPS HANDS) TOUCHING... LIKE WATCHING DRAMA SIA... WAH
LETS SEE

I DID FEEL YOUR'LOVE' YES I DID... ONLY WHEN YOU WERE INA GD MOOD...
EVERYTHING A SIS TER SHOULD DO TO A BRO...: SO CAN ABANDON ME LA?
ANYTHING I WILL GUIDE YOU ALONG THE WAY... YOU LEFT ME BLIND TO CROSS A BUSY ROAD ALONE

THANX TO ALL OF YOU...

feeling a little better without all this rage in me...
if not... wah i broke 4 glasses and 1 saucer just now... serious sh*t lucky didnt cut myself
lucky not expensive...

the reason why i post this... is not to insult or to find fault with ppl...
this is my true feelings, honest
i have to let it out before i do something really bad, which i dont want to do

so if i hurt any of you... i'm really sorry... from the bottom of my heart
i purposely didnt include any names... so as to not directly hurt any one...
my sincere apologies

2006-10-21T00:56:00.000+08:00

this is my last post for a while...

i won't be able to use the net at home anymore.. here's why...

1) this computer isnt mine, it belongs to my mother... i was under the impression that she would mind me using it for work and school and stuff... but i was wrong

you see... my mother is a psychotic, calculative sorry excuse for a mother...
she treats me like a tenant in my own home... sorry... her home
i'm 17, and throughout my years of life... she has given me the worse injuries, i've ever had...
from a torn lip that needed stitches, to a huge cut on my head which needed 7 stitches, to countless bruises and much blood spilt... i never forgave her for any one of those cases...
growing up... i've always been on guard against her, mainly due to her often verbal and physical abuse

fine, i admit i wasn't an angel growing up, but nothing, and nothing deserves that kind of physical abuse,

i was 11, and very into science... i read somewhere that vinegar and salt could shine coins... and clean most metals very well... so i tried it in my kitchen, and it worked!!! i didnt have a container to keep the solution in, so i kept it in the nearest bottle i could find, and i wen of to do something, genuinely forgetting about the solution...

keep in mind the solution was very colourless and looked like water...

my maid at that time, saw it and yes... tried to drink it... fortunately she didnt...
and she told my mother that i tried to poison her, which wasnt true...
she immediately grabbed this tupperware bottle from the fridge... it was the tough molded type
and she continually smashed it against my head, full force and all her strength... she repeatedly hit my head with the bottle, with murderous force... about 16 to 17 times... not stopping till the flor was red with my blood...

i was 11... and about 2 pints worth of my blood was on the floor... i basically passed out,
and when i woke up, that maid was wiping my head with a towel, which didnt do much to stop the bleeding...

my mother then called my dad who was out, and told him "i just broke yr son's head, come get him" he of course rushed home and brought me to the doctors, where they stitched me up, without any numbing medicine, so i could feel every stitch, EVERY F*CKING STITCH!!!
with every stitch i hated my mum, and by the time i left the clinic, i honestly felt in my heart, I HAD NO MUM!!!

when we moved into our new home, sorry her new home, she bought herself a nice big bed...
and she got a bed for granny too... i got stuck with our old sofa... hard and dusty, and every night i sleep on it... every morning i wake up with a back back and neck ache... many times i've told her... but she doesnt care.... you know why, coz she doesnt want to UNNECCESARYLY SPEND MONEY ON ME!!!, HER SON!!!

nevermind...

it doesnt help that her mother, my grandmother hates me for some unknown reason...

i literally feel so alone in a place i regarded my home... every night i lie awake on that stupid sofa, and ask myself why... WHY DID GOD GIVE ME SUCH A WOMAN TO BE MY MOTHER!
I HOPE SHE READS THIS... I HATE YOU I HATE YOU FOR HURTING ME I HATE YOU TREATING ME LIKE THIS I HATE YOU I TRULY HATE YOU, THE ONLY REASON I STAY WITH YOU, ISN'T BECAUSE I WANT TO OK, I'M ONLY HERE SO THAT MY FATHER WOULD HAVE A PEACEFUL LIFE AND I DONT WANT TO TROUBLE HIM... YOU TREAT ME LIKE DIRT, LIKE A TENANT IN YOUR HOUSE, I WISH YOU WILL READ THIS
I WANT YOU TO FEEL ALL THE PAIN I WENT THROUGH, ALL THE PAIN!!! I WANT TO SEE HOW YOU LIKE IT, I WANT TO SEE YOU SUFFER WITH THE PAIN I WANT TO SEE YOU SUFFER!!! HOW I WISH I COULD JUST LEAVE YOU LEAVE THIS HOUSE, AND LIVE MY OWN LIFE FAR AWAY FROM YOU, HOW I WISH I'LL NEVER SEE YOU EVER AGAIN
YOU'LL NEVER HAVE MY LOVE, YOU'LL NEVER HAVE MY RESPECT NEVER!!!!!!!!

2006-10-20T20:48:00.000+08:00

hi everyone.... its been a long few days... alot has happened, things which outweigh blogging for the moment...

well, recently i got a phone call from Khaos,telling me that my grandma was in hospital...
as usual, she had an epilepsy attack... and as usual i thought she was going to be alright after a few days... well...

walking into NUH, i was feeling alright, all systems go, full steam ahead... until i took the elevator to the 5th floor, walking the 200+ meters to ward 57, which was at the far end of the main building... after walking the first 20 meters, i sorta felt weird... my 6th sense was acting up... it felt like bad news was waiting for me... the closer i got, the more my mind flickered...
i nearly passed out when i passed ward 55...

when i walked into the ward, and i passed the first few beds, i looked in, and i saw all these healthy old people hapily chatting with their grandchildren..., i felt a little better...

the second set of beds... i saw all these bed ridden people, all alone, no visitors, they returned my gaze, a lonely longing in their eyes... longing for some care, some concern... some attention, some human contact, other than that of the nurses, volunteers...

i was starting to feel a helluvalot worse than when i got out of the elevator... upon reaching the last set of beds, i was too freaked to look in... expecting alot worse.., luckily i saw Khaos, he was on the phone, but he pointed me in the right direction...

i walked toward a room with an open door... it was the one bed kinda ward, pretty expensive
anyways... words can't describe what ran thru my head, when i saw granma, lying on the bed...
all those tubes... heres a photo...

she's in a coma, she has a hole in her windpipe, thru the front of her neck... because, her nasal tract got infected... i just couldnt believe my eyes...

she used to be such a strong person, a little rough at times, but strong nontheless... great cook...she's a great person... i dont know how this happened, but i hope it ends soon...

my prayers are always with her... GOD bless you granma...

2006-10-18T01:42:00.000+08:00

Hey...

today was ok, only that i was very sick, and i still went to school.. because i wanted to accompany fathehah... she was completely against me going to school, fearing fo my well being and all that, but i managed to convince her that i was perfectly fine...

school was ok, had my first MFDI lesson in 3 weeks, which i slept thru, haha drool all over the keyboard that was my pillow... the meds made me drowsy... fathehah suspected i wasn't well... and refused to let me outta her sight... she loves me alot huh... baby, if yr reading this... i love you much2 too...

the day was coming to a close and the thought of my warm cosy sofa in my room, was too tempting... i slept thru my cust svc lesson too... being sick sucks... honestly... i used to love cust svc lessons, used to be so alert...

DAMN THE FLU!!!

my fever went down... but my left nostril still blocked and my right still runny... (i know, its hell honestly) thats when my cust svc teacher, who is also our SGEM proect teacher pulled the four of us aside, and wanted to rehearse the script for the skit we're acting in, and that stupid big mouthed alvin tu suggested meeting tomorrow... which is a holiday for my class... WTF, luckily i was too sick to pound his little ass into pulp, you see i wanted to stay home and rest... me being sick and everything... but NO, little butoh tu wants to meet tomorrow... KNN CCB!!!

we started out this SGEM(speak good english movement) project with 6 ppl...

Shuhua
Fathehah
Myself
Alvin
Hanisah
Kai Jye

hanisah and me were supposed to compose a song.... then she backed out of the project because she got no mood.. i'm so sorry... nxt time dont do yr exams either if you got no mood...
no sense of responsibilty, honestly

that nerd dick kai jye, was so freaking into this thing until suddenly his whole family wants to get married... nice timing kai jye... you are officially the master of lame and unbelievable excuses...dumb ass

i'm a really F*cked up mood now because

1) i'm really f*cking sick... took med when i got home just now at 4 and fell asleep... woke up at 1030pm all cranky for GOD knows what reason... fathehah msged me countless times while i was out cold...

2) because i have to go for this f*cking nonsense tomorrow and

3) because i'm seriously having caffeine withdrawal symptoms

i really dont mean to be b*tching like this but i just felt like it

its amazing what i just said...must be the chlorapheramine tablets i've been popping
i'm supposed to take 15 every hour right?

2006-10-17T03:08:00.000+08:00

well...

monday was a dead rush...

fathehah was waiting for me near my place, as usual because my place is between her place and sch... so i asked her to meet me at 7.. she got here at 630...

no problems with coming early... its a good thing... but i don't like ppl to wait for me, especially fathehah, (my upbringing) so i was planning on leaving at 650, but at 630 i got a call saying she was already here, even though she was gracious and thoughtful enough to ask me to meet her at 7, i couldn't so i started to rush....

i have an overdue IT project due, so i needed my data, which was in the laptop... problem was... laptop no with me... so had to folow my mum to go meet her colleague to get it... kept apologizing to fathehah... poor girl waited for me till 730... thats 1 hour folks...

i promised myself that i would start petty quarrels with fathehah like i used to anymore.. so i forced myself to calm down... rest of the day was great...

as usual... first day back to sch.... half the class was missing, and so was the teacher.. he arived about 10 mins late... all the dudes in my class with the extremo hairstyles were marked absent because yr not supposed to come into class with long hair...

i personally agree with that but hey dude, first day back at sch... cut em some slack..

then afternoon lesson was cancelled... so we all finished sch at 11... fathehah accompanied me back to my place and waited for me to put my bag down... very heavy with the laptop and everything, then she wanted to go home early, so i sent her to e bus stop,waited with her until e bus came..

reached home and fell damn sick... in fact it took me about half an hour to type this out, because i feel so weak, plus i'm lying down... having fever 39.0 degrees, bad running nose... my mum always blames the haze when i get sick these days... poor indonesians getting framed

watching fulham v.s chelsea match on ESPN first 10 mins of the game 0-0...

anyways... gonna go eat something.. getting hngry, plus the fever is making me burn up. no fan sumore.... "sigh"

thanks for coming

Cheers

2006-10-14T23:59:00.000+08:00

Check Out this killer Dean Dimebag Darrell Rusted RazorBack guitar!

if only i had the cash for it...

USD$5549....

thats about....

ok... erm... thats alot of money... lol i think i'll get a cheaper look alike

like these... haha

2006-10-14T20:59:00.000+08:00

I'm in love this guitar!!!

Dean RazorBack V, love it! just wanna change the electronics a little then it'd be great!!!

love it!... designed by the Late Dimebag Darrel... RIP

2006-10-14T02:26:00.001+08:00

hi everyone...

ever had someone important in your life walk out on you... because you've done something to them which they can't forgive?

GOD created all humans to be imperfect... no matter what religion yr from...

we all make mistakes don't we? big or small?

Lemme take a poll...

If you did something bad... i mean really bad.... to your best friend, what would you do?
would you apologise? 99 percent of you guys reading would agree right?

ok now let me put it this way

if yr best friend did something bad to you... i mean really bad... to you, what would you do..
best friends should forgive and forget, move on in life right? best friends would love each other no matter what right?

"Asking to be forgiven doesn't make anyone smaller or weaker, or lower than anyone...
Those who forgive, have a big heart - Shah Rukh Khan"

"To err is HUMAN, but to forgive, DIVINE..."

i don't expect to be forgiven.......

i just want to be forgiven...

i tresure my friendships more than than kinship.... blood isn't thicker than beer...
i love all my friends all of them... even those that create problems all the time

if i were her, i would have hugged her, forgiven her, told her everything was ok, and forgotten the misdeed...

but thats me... i guess she doesn't share my insight...

if yr reading this... i'm sorry i hurt you girl, i really am... want you to know that i love ya k?

2006-10-12T16:47:00.000+08:00

hey everyone.... its good to be back on the net.... feels great

well... since the last i blogged, alot of things have changed, namely family and career wise

well lets start from the beginning...

on the 30th of april 2006 i applied for a job at the Night Safari, at the ben and jerry's outlet there, life was great, pay was ok... made alot of new friends learn alot of new things... and the ice cream... just short o heaven haha

anyways, on the 3rd of september, a problem rose, which caused me to make certain choices, some of these choices cost me my job... and on the 4th, i left B&J reluctantly... leaving friends and loved ones behind

anyways, i'm enjoying my life apending more time with my fiancee Fathehah... life is gd, and our relationship is gaining strength by the day...

family wise, haha, my twin lil brothers were born sometime in june...
Rifai Aiman was born at 0008hrs and Ryan Aiman was born at 0018hrs
both exremely cute, and i feel proud to be the oldest son yet again,
its a great feeling when ryan wrapped his fingers round my fingers, here i was, looking down at this little boy...

i just pray i'm priviledged to watch both of them grow up into sensible boys, which i didn't get the chance to for Shaqir and Sherene, my other two younger siblings... if only situations weren't such... if i knew my life would turn out this way, i would have changed alot of things in my past,
choices i made, actions i took.... and the things i didn't do, the people i didn't support, and the people i wrongly supported...

well, whats done is done and its no use for me to cry over spilt milk, (or risk electrocuting myself by cryng over this keyboard for that matter)...

my relationships with friends are worsening, people i kept so close to my heart, people i truly felt care for, now seem to deny my existence.. it saddens me deeply, beyond belief how someone, who i cared so much for, protected and nutured, had turned on me in my time of need... my god sister, whom i regarded my own flesh and blood, who promised to be there for me when i needed her, wasn't there when i recently broke down...

my own mother, now seems so calculative, she doesn't care about my well being anymore, she only seems to care how much money she spends on me... great example... she sleeps on a nice comfy bed... and so does granny... but me? i sleep on our old sofa, which she put in my room... many a time i have complained about back aches caused by the uncomfortable stiffness... but she doesn;t listen...she literally has drawn a line between mother and son, what kind of mother is she, to put aside kinship, care and affection on her own blood... i feel so alone....
i honestly feel so alone... with only Fathehah, my GODsent angel, to guide me along my path of life...

sometimes i just lie awake at night and wonder, what sin did i commit, that the world had turned on me that GOD is testing me this way... when will it end? when will it get better? am i doomed to live in sorrow all my life?

2006-03-07T08:46:00.000+08:00

sighs.....

its been a long few weeks....

remember that girl i fell in love with? well, on the 18th, she accepted my proposal...

YAHOO!!!!

we are very in love!!! i love spending time with her and life is gd!!!
everyday with here is pure paradise on earth and a day without her is absolute torture!!

i love Fathehah very much, and i can't imagine life without her.... heres to a beautiful relationship

HIP
HIP
HOORAY!!!

2006-02-13T08:24:00.000+08:00

I'm in LOVE!!! She's In my class here in ITE... she's the most perfect girl ever... kind, compassionate, understanding, cute and she laughs at my jokes... i haven't had such strong feelings for someone before...... its really a fairy tale for me... although she hasn't accepted my proposal yet, i really love her and i'd do anything for her.

I"M IN LOVE!!!

tomorrow is valentines btw, and i intend to get her something romantic, like last friday when i got her the book; "100 ways to say I LOVE YOU"... which she asked me to write a love note inside....

can't stop smiling!!! I"M IN LOVE!!!

2005-10-23T19:11:00.000+08:00

CROSSBRED RAWKS!!!

2005-10-23T19:09:00.000+08:00

CROSSBRED RULES!!!!!!

2005-10-19T18:18:00.000+08:00

hey y'all... if you're wondering why i haven't blogged in 6 months.... its coz i've moved outta my dad's house due to "creative differences". i'm living with my mum and life is getting better as we speak....

my dreaded n levels are over.... so its time to live it up!!! i've been takings lessons from my dear friends to master my guitar-playing, or just play better..... things like church modes, ionian, dorian and mixolydian scales..... sweep and string skipping arpeggios, chromatics and the list goes on........ i can honestly say my playing is WAY better than the last time i blogged....

well in the last month i've gotten to know three great musicians from a band called CROSSBRED
the lead guitarist, Ben Chua is one of the best guitarists i've ever seen......the rhythm guitarist, Simon Vai(formerly known as Simon Lai)is a really nice guy and is quite well read when it comes to playing guitar.... recently he asked me to be his guitar tech(a sort of guitar mechanic)
boy was i happy...... its great to be amongst such gifted musicians

enough about music!!!

life is getting better! my grades are getting better, pulling up.... though my math needs a helluva lot more effort.....sciences need more work too.....

its the fasting month according to the muslim calender! muslims all round the world fast daily from dawn to dusk, for 1 month from the 3rd of october to the 3rd of november

and hari raya, a muslim holiday falls on the 4th of november.....
hoping to get lots of $ to fund my guitar change..... to the new Ibanez RG350EX you can see it here.....http://ibanez.com/guitars/guitar.asp?model=RG350EX

it was nice being online again.... until next time....

CHEERS!!!!

p.s Love "time is running out" by muse
off the SuperFresh2 Compilation cd go get it!!!

2005-05-08T19:11:00.000+08:00

hi y'all, my hibernation is over..... lol i'm very very sorry i havent been blogging for like 7 months haha, its because i walked out of my dad's house and i'm staying with my mum permanently, and she doesnt have net, coz we live in a rented flat in hougang. well life is getting better, mum got a new higher pay job and my studies have picked up, but me love life aint gettin any better.....WTH am i fated to die a lonely old man? anyways, alot has happened since i last blogged. Cant really elaborate now, i have certain matters to settle, after which i shall pour my guts otu, hang loose y'all ROCK ON!!!

2004-11-10T01:07:00.000+08:00

Hey, everyone, sorry my blog hasn't been updated for over 2 months lar, really truly very sorry.

well, alot has happened to me these two months, and i'm somehow glad i went through it alone.

That's just me, I don't like to let anyone suffer because of me, or suffer with me......... if it involves me, its my problem and mine only, because i was brought up with this simple teaching my dad taught me years and years ago, "It's OK if you can't help, Just dont give anyone problems" I've kept this saying true to my heart, if you ask many of my friends, I'll keep mum about alot of stuff haha, you could call me anti-social but i call myself content-restriction

anyways, I'M SINGLE!!!!! haha, i've gotten over all the gals in my lie, and now i'm free, but i'm not really that up-for-grabs yet...... but i'm open to anyone lar....... if she's really my type.... then i might consider lar. haha
big eyes, quiet, sweet kind and forgiving, those are MY TYPE lol haha, all my past GFs were liddat i dont like those super-outgoing type.........make me feel so paiseh you know.......... coz i'm pretty reserved as a person, but if the girl plays guitar!!!! HAHAHA WHAT A DREAM, yea as many of you all know, i'm a guitar freak... to date, i have 3 guitars......... all totally different....... argh........ so damn bored.... so tomorrow i'll going to my relatives house to prepare for deepavali...... LATER DUDES!!!!

2004-09-12T23:59:00.000+08:00

hey y'all whats been up, well........

Went to play soccer at West Coast Park yesterday, nearly killed sum lady with my "Fantastic" skills haha, you should have seen the ball hit her on the head HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, the ball was pumped quite hard oso haha.

ok enuf with the sadistic talk, i've come to know of a certain ACS(Barker) Guy hu has been giving a certain girl trouble...... my boy, run all you want, but you can hide frm me!!! i will N.Y.P.D yr ass!!!!
NOCK YR PUNK-ASS DOWN!!!! well...... thats only erm..... after i find out erm...... who you are (blush!!!)

well nuthin much to blog, gona sleep, have to wake up tomorrow early... got school.... so byes!!!! God BLess

PEACE OUT AND LATER DUDES!!!!

2004-09-10T01:52:00.000+08:00

hi, finally came home today after being at my mother's place since tuesday.
hols have been good, went out with my mum, she spent nearly 200 on me in 1 day buying bags, and clothes. Bought this new wax, its called the architect wax by loreal, quite nice leh, nice smell too. anyways my mummy is my mobile bank lolz.....

today, my friend pei ru came over to do her compo lar, turns out my dad not in, so me have to meet her outside, and edit the compo till we could get to my house and type it in. quite sian.... she's a great friend if you like listening to ppl.
she likes to talk and i like to listen to her, tell you a secret lar..... i love her very very much. she knows this i think and i know she'll nvr accept my heart so i'm just trying to be the best fren i can, helping her in alot of things lar. it hurts me alot when she says certain things about me, but i only feel these later.....
i'm more than happy to b around her or talk to her, but she treats me a little erm.... badly... but i'll endure anything for her, and i'd trust her with my life.
i want to get over her, seeing that she loves sumone else, but something is hindering my chances of forgetting her. Try my best lar

Well, going back to my mum's house tomorrow to pick up the rest of my stuff, b4 spending the weekend with my REAL family, one thing gd about my step family is the relatives, this family is veery close knit, al the grannies are very nice ppl, caring too. they dote on me like hell..... using mi as examples to show their own kids lol. anyways, gonna go check on my brother good morning to y'all and God bless
LATER DUDES!!! CHEERS!!!

2004-09-07T00:05:00.000+08:00

hey all again, just got back from East Coast, we went there for dinner. Anyways, today was ok, slowly getting my act together. Luck is pickin up, people actually wanna hear what i want to say, rather than just blow me off with the familiar sounding phrase "Whatever". Which is kinda cool, or it could be because they know i'm having problems and wanna be sort of sympathetic.....that would be lame lar, but i am oblivious to the fact. HAHA attention seeker that i am.

Anyways, yesterday was me lil god bro's bday..... Rohan, here's to you being a 15 year old now.... dun worry, SIR has yr ic lol. also, me bestest friend ever, Haida turned 15 yesterday also.. Cheers to you girl, love you. But if both of you want presents, yr better off asking Santa for his beard....my pay hasnt come in yet, look for me after the 12th...

Anyways, my Wednesday if now free thanx to Pei Ru cancelling our movie date.....
crapz, now have to reschedule, but i'll b seeing her the nxt day, have to do her homework for her... have to help my cutie pie with her English Compo lol, she'll skin me alive if she heard me calling her that. Well its midnight now, feeling kinda woozy.... gonna go sleep...God Bless LATER DUDES!!!!

2004-09-06T02:39:00.000+08:00

hi all, sorry i havent blogged for a very long time, i've been having some serious emotional and relationship stress lately, it got near breaking point round where i last blogged and instead of facing it, i ran away from it all. Sometime last week, I picked my balls up and did my level best to settle all my problems, and i can safely say, my mind is at peace....

I have no reason to discuss my problems with anyone other than the ones involved, so dont bother asking, but to those who stood by me when i was on the verge of suicide, namely Draobetaks, David, Pei Ru and Joel, Cheers to you all for it is because of you wonderful ppl that i am still blogging. My guitar is wonderful therapy, food for the soul and mind, great stress reliever. I have abandoned Rock and Metal music until further notice, I have adopted Blues into my arsenal of genres. It suits me well as i kinda like slowhand playing.

Anyways, I have decided to stop dating till I enter Poly, its too big a heartache if a relationship fails. I wouldn't know what to do in that case, except kill myself...... By the way, i have a knife with my name on it now. just kidding "sadistic humour" well heres a little truth i wanna tell sum ppl. the girl i love so dearly and yet so far out of reach has told me and i quote, "You are here to inject laughter and humour into my life, that is the limit. " OUCH!!!
if you wanna know how much that hurts me, try jumping off the Ritz carlton and falling on a puddle of thumbtacks...... What does she think I am? a damn comedian? I LOVE HER DAMNIT!!! some ppl have really enormous egoes.....
or maybe its just my ego...... either way, i'm still a little comedian in her view

Latest News: The song titled, "The Reason" by the punk rock band, Hoobastank
has been removed from Scott's personal favourtie songs list due to intense emotional and spiritual trauma caused by numerous heartaches - The Daily Riff.

Anyways, Have a good holiday week, stay healthy and smile always. Farewell and God Bless LATER DUDES!!!!!

2004-08-23T23:27:00.000+08:00

hey...... its about quarter to midnight now....
i've had a few moments to think about stuff, like my school work, my social life, and my responsibilities.

She may have forgiven me, but i can't bring myself to forgive myself...... i just cant. i hate myself so much for doing what i did to her. i really feel like hurting myself in some twisted demented way, no matter how much it would anger GOD. I love her so so much and yet i did this to her...... what kind of a sick freak am i? She's this innocent girl and i.......ARGH!!! Feel so suicidal now.... i still love her very much, but she broke up with this guy and she still loves him too. i dont know what to do with myself, honestly i wanna hurt myself SO bad..... not that i can hurt myself now that its practically morning, emotionally torn ppl need sleep too ya know

well, gonna go think sumore now.... i have alot of things to think about
bye y'all n god bless
NIGHT DUDES

2004-08-23T17:02:00.000+08:00

Hi all, today is a really great day for me.....

here it comes... okay, theres this girl i've been erm....... hiding frm for the past year(since last sept) i was a real jerk to her then(i'm not like that anymore, i'll have you ppl know) and when i finally plucked up all the courage i had in myself and SMSed her this morning at 12am, not only was she awake and replied, SHE SAID SHE DOESNT HATE ME ANYMORE!!!
WOOHOO!!! So i was on my wway to meet her just now, walked thru Causeway Point when sumthing in my head told me to go back out, and i did, and i saw this damn chio girl(actually i only saw her back lar.....) and IT WAS HER!!!!! OMGosh, she looked so different
so we chatted for a while outside Causeway Point, oblivious to the hot sunny weather.
She's really super nice now, just like i remembered her back then, hope to see her again....hmmmm do i have feelings for her......YES!!!! since LAST SEPT!!!! lol.....

Anyways, we had the Prefects Installation today, last period which extended to 2.30pm..... craps, anyways Tang Chee Kuan (A.K.A Satan) was the compare for a while, and made alot of mistakes e.g saying the names to fast, and also pronouncing "prefect" as 'preflects'
which made the whole concert hall echo with laughter...... haha still gives me the giggles
anyways, gonna go have a bath and chit chat with my buddies on the phone (p.s kim, you havent replied my email...try to do so soon oh and also.... DONT BELIEVE ANYTHING NICK LIM SAYS)

2004-08-21T22:21:00.000+08:00

hey guys (and girls), sorry havent writen for the past 2 days, been kinda busy....
trying to play big brother and taking care of my baby sis, Sherene. My bro Shaqir, is at his babysitter's house. He has exams on Monday and feels he can study better there..... what nerve an 8- year old can have... i have no idea who he gets it frm...

anyways, got my super-long hair cut today together with my sis... I'd say there's a significant change in hair style..... i actually look like a Heavy Metal Guitar Soloist...
well...... if i put solid on my hair anyways.....

Got school on Monday, don't want to truant but i cant really control my immune system, its extremely weak and sensitive. Lets say theres a cat on the ground floor, and i happen to be on the third floor, i'll start sneezing like hell and have sore, watery eyes for the rest of the day, maybe two.... pretty sad life lar. Going to the KK hospital on the 23rd of next month(Day b4 Mum's Bday!!!!) see what the Doc says lar....

Well, my baby sis is extremely and unusually affectionate today, clinging on to me like she does when mum scolds her.... the fact is that no one is home except me, Sherene and the stupid maid... Parents and GranParents are out going to ppl's houses and meeting clients.... played my guitar a whole damn lot today..... anyways, if anyone can think of how i can get $1200, pls doodle on my doodie, or email me at syafiqjohan@hotmail.com

anyways, my sis is getting a little tiny bit crazy.... dancing to Steve Vai's "For the Love Of God" gonna go play with her 4 a while b4 tucking her in.... bye and god bless
LATER DUDES!!!!

2004-08-19T18:43:00.000+08:00

hi everyone, i just got my modem back frm Dad, as you can see.... it works ok now, few hiccups here and there. anyways, feeling kinda sick today. getting stomach cramps n nausea (i'm not pregnant lar!!!!) might go to the doctors tomorrow, got no time today. Mom and Dad going out for sum business thing
anyways, WE'RE GETTING A CAR!!!!!!! a sky blue Toyota Wish.........Beautiful thing, we're getting it at the end of the month. back to mom and dad, their gonna buy me back a KFC dinner yay........

ARGH, no one tags my blog.......... not even my so called "best frens"
DAVID!!! ,CDP!!!! and DRAOBETAKS!!! oh (note to kim, his name doesn't have an E but since you spelt it that way on yr bloggie, he has decided to change it to DRAOBETAKES)

eh, those ppl hu read my blog, pls try n tag my doodle board, not to the extent of flooding and spamming though (ps. to kim get the IPs of the flooders and flamers and send it to abuse.com, serves them right!!!) just leave a msg that you've read my blog or sumthing lar...... i know i'm not very popular amongst ppl but those hu know me or dunno me just tag lar.........

anyways, didnt go school today, because i not feeling well, missed the chem test, crap....... cannot retake without MC mutherecoil!!!!!!!!!!

heard CDP's ball got confiscated by Hock Jew, i will sort it out when i get back 2 school. it seems we can't play at 3E1 homeground (Student Activity Center)
anymore....... KPKB, all because of sum guys who dunno how to play soccer and ram the ball constantly over the fence into sum guy's house. all ball games are banned until further notice.......wait, wait WHY DOES THE GUY LIVE RIGHT UNDERNEATH THE TENNIS COURT? oi uncle if yr reading this, take sum advice from a fellow human..... MOVE!!!!!

concludes my blog for the day: Bye and God Bless
LATER DUDES!!!

New Fave Guitar: Ibanez RGT32FMSP, 5pc maple and walnut neck thru american basswood body wings, flamed maple top. rosewood fingerboard with iron cross inlays..... IBZ V7 and V8 pickups 5-way switch.... master volume and tone Lo-Pro EDGE Tremolo - SGD$1200

2004-08-18T11:25:00.000+08:00

well, in my incredibly noisy library now... full of the accursed lower sec short pants wearing kids
biting each other and kissing each other..... yuck
anyways, that ******CDP didnt come today so i cant play soccer, that *&^%$%^&
nvrmind, at least i get to blog. might b going to his house later to visit him.... with drao, hmmm, i seem to have forgiven him without realising it. he's a nice guy lar, but he thinks i'm his damn punching bag..... he's cause me at least 3 to 5 injuries, but hey, he's my fren nand i intend to keep it that way. anyways, the bell just rang, have to go to Malay class now, will try to blog later if i can.... bye and god bless LATER DUDES!!!!

2004-08-17T11:43:00.000+08:00

ahhhh.... a comm at last. yesterday, granny's comm kena spyware cannot surf properly.....
so i nvr blog yesterday. anyways, yesterday had to go pick up my lil bro frm school, brought him for lunch at McDonalds b4 going home lar..... then go play soccer outside, finally at about 9+ he remembered that he didnt do his hmwk, and didnt want to do it anyway, he kena slap frm me like 4 times. still nvr do......... haiz.... pain in the neck man!!!

hmmmm btw, picked up a copy of Teenage, yesterday coz there was this pic of a damn cool looking Mercedes McLaren Siemens SX1 phone, found pics of Kim inside.... wow i was realy blown away
she looked so.................erm...................... nvrmind, just in case one of my "frens" read my blog
anyways, nick lim got BCP in history today by the Vulture, HaHa revenge!!!!! serves him bloody right for treating me like his bloody punching bag.... i've tolerated him 4 too long....
anyways, in the library now. going to play soccer soon. the librarian really one mutherecoil....
dont want to accept my ez link card.... wah piang eh i wanted to knock her knuckle head
but nvr mind, we should be fillial to senior citizens(FOGEYS). and that damn an ren kept smsing me for guitar stuff yesterday, really wanted to shut him well.... have to go play now... talk to y'all later.... bye and god bless LATER DUDES!!!!

2004-08-15T10:27:00.000+08:00

its been like 11 days since i lasy blogged, me thinks..... well, my modem screwed up pretty bad, so the singtel ppl took it away for sum reason..... anyways a few ppl to make a shout out to......

Kim: reply me anytime you like, studies come first anyways.....link me to yr blog if ya got the time....
CDP: better come to school on monday, i feel the need for soccer!!!
Drao: I wanna go watch a movie nxt week.... either monday,wednesday or thursday, maybe AVP or twin effect, go with me?
Haida: Get the 6610i, quite ok la....not that ex either, looks cool too, the blue one only
David: Need sum help with the HTML coding, details later when we meet nxt time.
Bhavik: YOUR PHONE IS NOT WORTH $200++, ITS WORTH LESS THAN $100, STOP BOASTING!! MOFO

Anyways, currently using the net at Granny's place, 56k, awfully slow.... takes about 5 mins to actually see Kim's blog, even longer for Nick Lim's blog haiz..... beggars can't be choosers anyways. My brother, Shaqir is playing his little XBOX thing. At least he's not disturbing our baby sis.... Going to take a shower and grab my breakfast of a bowl of instant noodles and Teh Peng, which is Milk tea with ice, in coffeeshop lingo.....my mandarin getting pretty gd, although i cant carry on a decent conversation with anyone.... at least i can tell bhavik to shut up in 6 different languages now..... hehehehehehe. ok la, gonna go wash up and ciao soon, talk to y'all later. LATER DUDES!!!!

2004-08-04T00:28:00.000+08:00

Hi everyone, finally got my Internet running. Thanx to the Singnet Customer Service for the efficent service. Hats off to you wonderful ppl. Theres been a slight mixup of communication past few days. An email i sent out had not reached the receipient, and i had not received the failed returned mail like i always do. I unknowingly said some things which might have offended someone, you know who you are. I am very truly sorry if i had offended you in any way. BLAME HOTMAIL!!!! haha kidding

well, i managed to get a doodle board up today,(technically yesterday but who cares?) pretty interesting stuff. Now i can receive msgs immediately frm the anyone who doodles on my blog. Convenience indeed!!!

Haiz.... i didnt go to school today coz i felt really drowsy, common side effect of the FLU. The doctor then told me i had a very sensitive nose and booked me an appointment in KK hospital..... Come what may.. my appointment is on the 23rd of next month...... 2 days b4 an important day(cant elaborate further for now)Went to granny's place to see my sis, she's a little pain in the neck but she still cute in her own little devilish ways...(runs in the family, MUAHAHAHA)
had to leave sooner than expected bcuz of school tomorrow... So sad, had to leave my sis there.(older brother's sentiments) Oh dear look at the time, its WAY past my bedtime, gots to go and sleep, no MC for tomorrow.
Regards,
Syafiq

2004-08-01T21:23:00.000+08:00

Hey people, just got back from work..... si be tired liao. Handphone battery is dead, have to go and charge later..... Have school tomorrow, SIAN!!!. Well, hope mom and dad bring home sumthing nice to eat... "Evil Laugh"
Argh that Kim still haven't reply my mail...... So sad..... Is this how she treats her fans?.... "shut up Drao" finally found the time to reupdate my blog yesterday. This new layout rox......Oh, for all the metal heads and rock enthusiasts out there, the new Dream Theater CD, "Train of Thought" OWNS!!!
Scott's Recommendations 4 the day: Dream Theater : As I Am
Gary Moore : The Loner
Thanx Y'ALL for readin my bloggie.... Hope to have da time to blog 2moro...
byes....(P.S Kim, if yr reading this......REPLY MY MAIL PLS!!!)

2004-07-29T03:32:00.000+08:00

well ppl, its 3-15am SGT as i'm writing this..... i can't sleep.....
too many bloody things on my mind. too much more than a 15 year old can usually handle, i guess. Today was VERY ordinary. Gets boring sumtimes ya know.. Damn sian leh nowdays. Run here and there. Si Be Siong ar. Every week i sleep in 3 houses now. My house, mother's house and granny's house. Wah piang, then reach home damn late, damn tired and damn hungry so what i do? eat, then sleep. then wake up at this time and wait for my alarm clock to ring. Haiz. no wonder most girls find me boring...... if this goes on, i'll have no social life whatsoever.

Anyways, out with the Singlish and Hokkien.

Was looking at KW's blog. Quite nicely done i think. As usual, Drao will tease me about this. He thinks i'm obsessed with her......"sighs" People.......
Anyways. I'm getting interested in her blog. Looks way way better than mine. (No offense to Serene who made this cool looking thing). Must get somebody to teach me how to make one......either David or D can help. Both quite good at all this technical stuff.

Today, pretty uneventful. As usual, got called up by LHJ to go to that God-Forbidden SAW club during the recess break. When will i be spared? "Prays"
Not to bad, got to play soccer with the hardest soccer ball ever. Then as usual, played soccer after school. All in my great effort to lose weight. Pitiful "thinks to self" Well anyways. I'm starting to miss the folks at SSS, wonder how they're doing, nobody has SMSed me or called, E-mail either. I'm being AVOIDED!!!!!!
LOL. Well anyways, gotta go do "Stuff". Adios!!!

2004-05-17T02:35:00.000+08:00

hmm..... its 2.47 am, i have absolutely nothing to do but alot of thinking
its about the cd-player that was stolen frm me last year. it was one of the end-of-year
exams, i went back to my locker after the paper to find my locker wide open and my bag inside ransacked. among the things missing were of course my cd-player and my Metallica cd (black album) i didnt really report it stolen partly because it was illegal to have it in school.... and also beacause it was nearing the end of the school year.. well theres no chance of finding it now, i hope GOD can find the person who did it and grant him some conscience. well the jam session is on tuesday and my dad always uses it to play backing songs, he still doesnt know bout it. GOD have mercy on my soul when he finds out. i'll be a deadman... i don't know how to break it to my dad, the cd-player was supposed to have been at home. i've dodged this matter long enough and now its come back to haunt me i dont know what to do or say to solve this matter, unless i can buy a new cd player that looks like it in a span of 2 days that being until tuesday at 6. i dont think i can come up with the dough. what am i gonna do?i want to be a man and face up to my mistake but my evil side says otherwise....
i've been hiding from the evil one in me for the past 2 years, and he's surfacing again
i feel torn between doing whats right and continue living this crime, what should i do?
i'm gonna have a long think and i'll blog again later on
ciao GOD bless you all
my prayers to Gabriel, may the LORD keep you sane.

2004-05-04T21:26:00.000+08:00

hi all, just finished revision........ hmm bought a xray bee yoyo today, damn nice but looks abit gay, pinkish purple colour hehe, drao's is lime green like gurions bag colour lol damn nice to play lor but abit childish oso haha and that rat melvin stole my yoyo while i was at DCC, Sock Lee saw him with the yoyo walking out of DCC. gonna kill him bast*rd fren for so long wanna kohp my yoyo basket. so i called praveen, then some guy pick up the phone want to kpkb with me, i tot issac lar so i kpkb back turns out its darryl omg
heart jump sia, then praveen call me back lar, told me its darryl wah i damn scared sia, darryl is big shot leh.... anyways, i told praveen about the melvin - yoyo relationship lar then he say he'll call melvin so i said ok lor. then that creep send me sms ask hu i am when i know that he knows my number knn. aiya dun want to bore you ppl lar, anyways, davids back in action, he's still sick me thinks, get well soon boner!!! he's helping me with me template again..... what a nice guy dont you think? gonna have my fave guitar pic as a banner yay exciting man. oh had my math paper today, dunno if i can pass but i hope the LORD gies me marks that i deserve best...... bhavik as usual sleeping throughout the paper
playing guitar now, experimenting with new tunings currently its D-A-D-G-A-E haha and B-E-A-D-F#-B
sounding pretty muddy haha, kk gtg getting late...... god bless us all and i pray for Gabriel may the LORD help you reflect with all this free time

2004-05-02T18:14:00.000+08:00

hi sorry havent written 4 a while, been very busy studying n stuff. just got back frm visiting mum, she's ok and so's my cat. my kitten is growing, sleeps a heck of a lot. have a ss/ssh paper 2moro studied a little 4 it but didnt have my history book so i dun think i'll do well 4 the history parts...... haiz..... si be sian
davids really sick...... cdp is forever sleeping..... and drao...... well...... he's fine, hmmm must be a virus.
well, gonna try to figure out "FUEL" again..... my fingers getting rusty..(not the strings) well, my inverse is helping me witha layout for this blog...... i'll put it up when its done ok ppl going to bathe...... ttyl
god bless all and to gab chong, hold on and to rachel and darryl, cine rocks haha and to mrs slayer
sembawang sec was a better choice darling........

2004-04-27T19:08:00.000+08:00

hey guys, its been a very comical day...... first i throw my bag of the 5th floor only to have my antacid bottle break inside it and cause this big mess...... luckily i took the gd stuff outta my bag first.... except my meds silly me...... the rest of the day was fine....... until after school that is.... we went to play soccer at the student activity center and our dear melvin was playin with the fire extinguisher and dropped it on the floor, it in turn sort of blew up and there was dry powder all over the place....the game was stopped for a while coz of that white stuff floating around...... funny as it was... i was dead pissed with everyone..... so anyone that got past the halfway line with the ball had better watch out coz they all got rammed by me......firt time i took my shirt off to play..... too damn pissed and hot.... went to SSS after that....
had a lil' chat with Claudia, and turns out Adri's ex is her classmate...... small world eh? then guess what... Pei ru walks past me and i say hi and she just continues walking....what nerve! all i wanted was to hear her speak!!! is that too much to ask? all i've wanted for months is to hear her voice...... why isn't HE granting me this one priviliege? have i sinned too much against HIM? just to hear this girls voice my goodness what the heck do i have to do....... well..... can't do much at this time, going to study with pui kheng and yixian on saturday gonna drag my bro darryl down too...... need to catch up on studies lor
well gonna go play cs haha gtg and god bless prayers for 3e1, 3e1, SSS and SMSS and gabriel and rachel

2004-04-26T21:39:00.000+08:00

hey...... got back frm melvin's place, his mum invited me over to study YEA RIGHT!!! like i'd actually study...... i'll study, but only when someone i trust is around.... YIXIAN!!! TUTOR ME IN MATHS PLEASE!!!
haha hope she doesn't read this...... today was a great commotion..... "announces" TONIGHT ON PAY-PER-VIEW! JOEL "VICIOUS" KOH SQUARES OFF AGAINST JOE "SCREAMER" CHENG!!!!
haha, just a dose of humour into today's blog..... joe cheng modulated our test scores and said that we couldn't see our test papers..... if not..... well the next part is crap.... he said that we had to accept our lower marks..... i didnt want to see but well joel had somthing to say about it..... i just feel that maybe he just couldn't accept the fact that bhavik got higher than him in the test haha talk about ego.......
well he got the entire class angry enuf to wanna beat the crap outta him.......not surprisingly he didn't show up for bhavik's party for obvious reasons...... haha well thats all i have to say today have to do sumthing now..... bye all god bless and my prayers will be with Gabriel, Rachel, and everyone in 3e1 and 3e1 and SMSS

2004-04-25T20:48:00.000+08:00

hey dudes..... just got back from a frens house........ finally have the time to update my blog after 3 days
haiz...... yesterday had English paper 1 and 2 not too sian lar, but not too easy to bochap oso
after exam went to visit ng sock lee left my file and stuff there again so finally went to pick it up with melvin and Dr@0B3+@k5 and !nV3r5e then i went over to mel's place to maintain our guitar...... a pewter Epiphone Les Paul Studio. was mucking around there for too long and left only at 9.30pm
came home and got screwed, dad got pissed, mom got pissed coz i didnt go to see her. called her today and she got all weird and told me that i didnt need to come........ having divorced parents is shit. my dad is a total wacko nowadays and my mom is a schizo....... well intending to stay up all night coz if i dont, i'll miss my ride tomorrow for sure so gonna do some work now......... god bless us all and my prayers to gabriel and rachel, may the lord keep you both safe and sound......

2004-04-22T21:11:00.000+08:00

hi all again...... just came back from visiting my mom. its her off day today. had a nice chat and dinner with her. CDP wasn't in school today, was worried 4 a while, he was online last night but he didn't answer my msgs and didnt answer my calls. i thought he passed out or something, turns out he had a medical checkup...... phew load of my mind..... havigng ppl comeover to see the house..... the dude just tried to carry the Streamer....... basket.......anyhow touch...... knn. anyways..... got 2 DCs 4 not reporting 4 BCP yesterday, bloody LCK. haiz..... have to get a letter for sports day coz i didnt go..... aint gonna risk getting BCP so close to the exams..... Saturday is my first paper, English 1 and 2 hope i do well this year dunt wanna get retained hey.......i aint Adler... haha TJR played "truant" today haha we went to the learning center and he didnt know but he walked pass the class, looked in and walked off........ haha
kena BCP LOSER!!! well..... my bro darryl has somt shit goin on so i gtg help him lar
bye all
my prayers go out to gabriel chong...... may the lord keep you safe and sound
god bless us everyone

2004-04-21T22:28:00.000+08:00

hi all, its been a good week...... "he" somehow managed to stop insulting me, my ears are recovering frm the silence haha, not that he isnt insulting me anymore, i can finally say his name, Joel Koh, turned into this great friend overnight, his supernatural power to insult ppl has finally seen its last days. Joel Koh, heres to a gd year being yr classmate...... there was a NAPFA test today, hope at least i got 1 point haha, i was never physically active, but i'm not overweight either...... funny right? well....... today was tiring, legs damn pain..... and Calvin Ding thinks i'm his punching bag, keep punching me in my shoulder, si be pain liao
anyways, today it seems some sec 2 guy slapped Carolyn, wah Tang hero help her. haha and Darius pushed
Alex up into her classroom...... tried to defend him but Tang keep kpkbing me wtf. garrett oso kena frm him that guy like protective over Carolyn haha. hope he doesnt see this, if not.......(runs finger across throat) i die liao........ haiz........ its nearly 11 and i havent had my coffee....... haiz....... better go drink it lar gtg
god bless us everyone
and miracles DO happen

2004-04-18T00:35:00.000+08:00

hey all....... its 0045 bored and scribbling some stuff on my writing pad......(guitar stuff as usual)
went to the wedding function (well...... it was the day b4 the wedding so it was kinda slow........)
saw my ex-mother in law, she was glad to see me... and Haida's sis is still the same, puny and irritating, bue still retaining pre-adolescent cuteness, she's bout 11 me thinks, Haida wasn't there, i kinda expected that considering my history with her, well i didn't wanna see her either. Got home from the job at bout 5am this morning, supposed to go to school, obviously didnt........ had that track and field thing goin on at Toa Payoh stadium at bout 7 plus, couldn't wake up in time, so i thought to myself, "to hell with track and field, i ain't participating anyway....." woke up at a very sluggish time of 3 pm, watched a little T.V then got ready and went to the wedding thing...... pretty short day considering the time i woke up...... thats pretty much all i gotta say bout today, will write tomorrow, rain or shine gtg bye bye and god bless us everyone.........

2004-04-16T18:26:00.000+08:00

YAY! Friday is finally here! skipped d&t to go to SSS to see a few friends and give Yixian her belated birthday present of a SWATCH watch, she sent me a few thank you smses, then we started to talk bout pei ru lar, it seems she has distanced herself from her once-best friends, what has gotten into her?
if only i could have a chat, a heart to heart talk with pei ru. maybe i can find out and maybe even help........
but thats all just "ifs" i have to go call my mum about my arrangements this weekend, gtg god bless us everyone

2004-04-15T19:36:00.000+08:00

haiz...... its 1946 and i just got back frm school, well not actually..... school finished at 1.35, and i was supposed to see Lau CK, but i didnt want to lar i mean like, who does? so i'm gonna give the excuse that i had a funeral to go to, which is true but i didnt go lar, went out with -=[Dr@0B3+@k5]=- until bout 4 plus lar.... then i went library to finish my homework..... haiz...... that guy started to pick on me again, while i was giving my speech in class during english, he was like openly criticising me. aiyoh cannot tahan him man
and he was like insulting bhavik in Chem lar, so i asked him to stop it (note: i wasnt doing it for bhavik, it was just too irritating to me) then he was like making fun of me again, dunno what am i gonna do bout him , time will tell...... ok gonna go play cs now, ciao dudes and god bless us everyone

2004-04-15T00:21:00.000+08:00

hmmm...... its 00.30 am and i'm wide awake, BAD SIGN!!! chances are that i aint gonna sleep tonight
just helped Camila start her blog, I have photo taking later on, gotta look sharp for that CAMERA!!!!
LIGHTS!!CAMERA!!CHEESE!! hope the pic turns out fine......i hope you-know-who doesnt insult me today
i'm just so sick and tired of him but i keep giving him chances for absolutely no reason whatsoever!!!
maybe its just that i couldnt be bothered bout him nowadays. tomorrow is thursday hmmmmm got smackdown at 2200, must watch. sunday theres a wedding that my dad's invited to, Haida's mum got invited too... hope i get to see her and at least talk to her. Pei ru still wont talk to me..... its been what like 4 months since we actually said hi to each other. retribution for saying those things to her back then.
wish i could take them all back, maybe i'd still be with pei ru, just maybe..... well, should thought bout all these things before saying anything like that to her. Pei Ru, if you're reading this, i am truly very sorry for what i said to you. i respect yr decision to not forgive me... but if you do, i'll be the happiest man alive
so good bye and god bless us everyone

2004-04-14T23:08:00.000+08:00

ok..... its 11.20 pm now......... just finished my lit homework....... si be heng ar.
that kim wakerman rejected my invitation to add her to friendster but she added BHAVIK!!!!
KIM WAKERMAN ARE YOU BLIND????? wah piang heart drop when she rejected me..........
but she added bhavik WTF......the world has turned upside down!!!!
well today was ok, he was insulting me again...... the usual lar..... i just dun want to get him into trouble and make things worse........ Joe cheng really pushing my class to the limit, nearly complained him to John hunt, but issac backed out for god knows what reason.... the day sucked big time..... photo taking tomorrow...... have to bring tie and all that crap lar...... have to look good lor if not condemned in the 2004 school mag for life..... g2g going to play cs and talk to my buddy,Cam god bless us everyone

2004-04-14T03:04:00.000+08:00

hmmmmm, its 3.13am and i'm really really bored
kinda got back late today, went out 4 supper didnt eat much
goin back to school later, after 1 day of rest. having lit tomorrow and i have to see that GUY again
he's a really pain in the ass, get what i mean? one of the few reasons y i hate coming to school.
of course the rest of the reasons being homework and boring leasons......
he justs wont let me see the light of day sometimes....
well another big big hurdle before the end of the school day.
will post again later dudes
gtg and god bless